A letter to my younger self – Aged 25

Hi hunny,

So you got married young then. And the little one’s starting school already! *sigh*

Well of course in a different universe you’d have listened to what I told you last time, but as it is you’ve sort of “blown it”. Now you have responsibilities to others so it’s going to be tricky trying to be yourself, isn’t it?

Ok, I’m not going to press the point too much. You know as well as I do that your late teens were the time when you actually needed to get done something about it and have a fulfilling life ahead of you.

You did have a good body back then; the shoulders still weren’t too wide, and you were still slim from the waist down. You still are.

Your hair was growing beautifully long and thick, and it had that lovely natural wave in it too. Ok, not the prettiest face on the planet, but with the help of makeup you’d still have made a great girl.

But that’s all by the by now.

The good news is that you’re really going to enjoy that new career in IT, and in time it will take you to many foreign places too. You’ll enjoy that babe.

I’d like to tell you not to spend so many evenings in the pub playing darts, but I know it’s really just a part of you wanting to show the world that you’re “one of the lads”, as opposed to the truth that you and I both know.

People are starting to comment on the number of times they see you glancing at all the pretty girls passing by. I guess they think you’re perving, which in some cases you are, but we both know it’s just jealousy, isn’t it? You’re SO jealous now, seeing how you could have looked and the things you could be wearing. It’s called “trans envy”, hon.

Yes, you’re already starting to show signs of depression creeping on, and unfortunately it’ll be with you for many years to come.

But there we go, the die is cast, and it’s going to be long and bumpy road here on in. You’d better brace yourself, babe!

I’ll catch up with you again in another ten years. Watch the weight!

*hugs*

You, aged 67

2 thoughts on “A letter to my younger self – Aged 25

  1. HI Tish, I did have the “why I can’t be pretty like her syndrome?” Not so much jealousy, but a definite desire to look young and pretty. I realize at 60 that would never happen, and set my goal as looking like a nice mature woman, which eventually morphed into just looking like the best me. Hey, I am still looking at the woman, but then again what can I say “I like the girls” as another translesbian I know.

    Liked by 1 person

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